Happiness is a girl

Be still
while this change washes you away
to a safer distance

lie down in the cold
let the concrete cool you
to a lower temperature

let it happen
don't struggle
transition and transformation

what was
hot to the touch
will become
something more calm
and won't expire so quickly
once bright and blinding and sure to burn out
can softly light your path and last unto always

...if you trade in your maniac love

you have to forget one
and then you can have the other
that's the deal.
a trade in
probably a trade up
your damaged and rickety something
for a new young something else.
just as sincere
just as serious

even if somewhat less satisfying.

Surviving Adoration

You blink the lights of my imagination
on and off again in the attic of my mind
increasingly eccentric.
What place is there for you and I?
We meet on rotten earth where the ground is unstable
You never stay for long when sinking is inevitable
It's not a question of if, only when.
So what does this change?
We will meet either way
touch
and want


and hurt 
until the ground gives way beneath us

helplessness or ambivalence

And who will be left standing
at the end of the world

Are we even deserving of survival?

your sister has a friend whos names the same as mine

god
you're so fucking brilliant
in the truest sense of the word
like you shine
and glitter
and sparkle
It's the better part of the day that I spend thinking about that
about you.
in wakefulness and sleep
and on my way to both
you're the stain of light behind my sandpaper eyelids
like I've been looking at you for so long
that now you're always there
burnt into me
my most internal layer of skin
or because I want nothing more than to look at you all the time
now my eyes just make you for me.
I could never possibly be close enough
I want to press hard and sweat against you
like your lover or
your twin
I want to taste you in my mouth
I want to fuck you
and be the one that gets to love you.

Something wicked

oh darlin'

I gotta tell you sumthin right now

so listen close

there's a storm comin from over that mountain
and it's gonna hit us right here hard.
we gotta move quick now baby
that mean black in the sky means it'll be here soon enough.
you get them blankets from the hallway's closet
and I'm gonna nail the shutters closed.
you fill this basket with the things you wanna keep close
and I'll call the horses to get in.
don't cry
don't go crying now baby
when the storms come is when we gotta be strong.
we got a storm cellar
we got those canned goods I was keepin till winter
well it's our winter now I'd say.
and we can just sit it out down there.
And I'm gonna be there the whole time with you
just aholdin' you as tight as I can to me
I'll rock you to and fro till you feel safe
just you me and the lamplight
all night if you need it
I can just keep holdin on to you
till it stops blowin and pourin down
cuz damned if you ain't the only thing I've ever done right
and no storm can touch that
so that somethin wicked can this way come
and it's gonna boy
but don't be scared now
because I have a plan to send it right on back.

I fell Over, I'm a Lump.

So I made a wish

it didn't bleed when I cut it open.

see

I've been trying to scrape that boy out of me

lately

because like pumpkin seeds ruin a jack o' lantern

he's been sitting inside my mind

too long

he's been blocking any light 

that might shine behind my eyes

he's been darkening my smile

Bone Machine

They are the bone machines.
The elite, a special breed. They are svelte and lithe,
Their hip bones are sharpened.
They are the consumers of couture and carrot sticks. 
They are the thieves of the scandalous glare. 
They will come first, as they always have. 
They will walk in front, razor hips slicing side to side. 
They have french tip pedicures, and highlighted blond heads. 
Perfect faces and fake eyelashes. 
They wear bikinis and get invited to dance in the cages. 
They are the Ashleys the Megans the Brittanys, 
they are the Tiffanys
They say "Do you have this in a smaller size?". 
They pass on the cake